30...

I don't remember how old I was when I first told a friend that if I reached 30 and was still single I was going to adopt a kid. When I said it I really wanted to be a dad; still do. But I also thought 30 was forever away. It was like one of those possible, impossibilities; how could I reach 30 and still be single. It didn't fit my plans. By 30 I would be married and a father of a couple kids, at least. I would be pastoring a church and moving up the church leadership ladder.

A week and a half ago 30 came and went. At 30 I'm single and unemployed and living at my parents again. I have no idea what is coming next in life. I have no idea where I'll live next, or what my next job will be. I have no clue when I'll marry or who it may be. I'm sure not where I planned to be at age 30.

People have asked and I'm sure will continue to "Where do you see yourself in 5 years." I don't know how to answer that question, because I sure didn't see myself here 5 years ago.

It is disappointing to be "here" sometimes.

As I made my plans to be a father and a husband and a pastor, I also never planned some other things. I never planned to live in Africa. I never planned to meet my best friends at seminary. I never planned trips to Turkey, or Egypt, or Yemen, or Zambia, or Tanzania, or Paris. I never planned my parents would live in Africa as missionaries. I never considered pastoring college students in Arizona. I never planned to meet and spend parts of life with some of the incredible people I've met. I never planned to touch some of the lives I've touched, or to have my life impacted by so many people. I never planned to hurt so much. I never planned to learn so much.

Sure, I would give back some of the heartache. But I would never give back the lessons I've learned nor the ones I'm continuing to learn.

In a short 30 years I've lived more life than I could ever have dreamed. Some of my plans have been delayed and even changed. But the replacements have been well worth the adventure!!